I just really love this. Thanks to Mr. Rafael Nun for forwarding it to me!

A Nun Grading Papers

Can you imagine the nun sitting at her desk grading these papers, all the
while trying to keep a straight face and maintain her composure!

PAY SPECIAL ATTENTION TO THE WORDING AND SPELLING. IF YOU KNOW THE BIBLE EVEN
A LITTLE, YOU'LL FIND THIS HILARIOUS! IT COMES FROM A CATHOLIC ELEMENTARY
SCHOOL TEST.

KIDS WERE ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS. THE FOLLOWING
STATEMENTS ABOUT THE BIBLE WERE WRITTEN BY CHILDREN. THEY HAVE NOT BEEN
RETOUCHED OR CORRECTED. INCORRECT SPELLING HAS BEEN LEFT IN.


1. IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING THE
WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF.

2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH'S WIFE WAS JOAN OF ARK.
NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.

3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING
THE NIGHT.

4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH
UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS.

5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL LIKE
DELILAH.

6. SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.

7 MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH IS
BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS.

8, THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP
TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS

9. THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.

10. THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.

11. MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA THEN JOSHUA LED THE HEBREWS IN
THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.

12. THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO STAND
STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.

13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE FOUGHT
THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES

14. SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.

15. WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA.

16. WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND JESUS IN
THE MANAGER.

17. JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION.

18. ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.

19. JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE
THEY DO ONE TO YOU. HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEAT ALONE.

20. IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET THE
TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE.

21. THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.

22. THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.

23. ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN.

24. ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY WHICH IS
ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRAIGE.

25. CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY.

Congratulations Deacon Schrader

I just want to wish Rev. Mr. Dylan Schrader congratulations on his successful defense of his Master's Thesis here at Kenrick. He has worked tremendously hard on this! I can't say that I remember the name of his thesis, but it sounds smart.

In the photo, try to guess which one is Dylan and which one is the Angelic Doctor.

I totally forgot

Yes, I had forgotten that I have this blog. Not that I ever write on it or anything, but if anyone is interested, here is an update.

I am a transitional deacon now. I am assigned to St. Joseph Parish in Cottleville, and I love the people there. It is a great assignment. My thesis is coming along well, though I am not sure if I will be done with it by next Thursday. I have a new car. I have a new phone. I have less than eight months until priestly ordination. That's pretty much it.

Spring '08

Two months and Two weeks later...
Another semester here at Kenrick, and things are looking up in many ways. I think the overall spirit of the community is great, and this may be due in great part to such a long vacation. I was happy to get away for a while, but I also was very anxious to return.
Some things I am looking forward to:

1) Training for the Extraordinary Form - for me this includes helping Fr Keller train the new acolytes to serve the Low Mass, act as thurifer, candelbearer, and torchbearers for the Solemn High Mass. I am also interested to see if we will receive training in Gregorian Chant. We did have an opportunity to chant a couple of times over the break, once on retreat and twice at the Mass with the Archbishop in Washington DC.
2) The trip to New York to see the Holy Father. Lots of people are not happy about the location of the Mass at Yankee Stadium, but providence plays a hand! The long bus ride will be difficult, but at the same time, this is a great opportunity for us to be near the Pontiff.
3) Side work - although my MA work is not "side work", it will take up lots of extra time. I am happy to be working in liturgy, and please God, I will have a successful paper. Also, translating the Ceremonial written by Hegey from the original French to Engish, and also the Roman Pontifical from Trent to VCII from French/Latin to English, will also be exciting. I also plan to train myself on celebrating the Extraordinary Form.

I know these things are probably not very exciting to anyone, especially since my readership includes...pretty much no one. Oh well!

As usual, I hope to blo more frequently, but history would suggest otherwise. Keep your fingers crossed!

What's New

The fact is that nothing is new, and I mean that in two sense: first, that everything is continuing in my life in a normal fashion, and second, that I have neglected my blog in the normal fashion. I didn't realize how much time it would take to post every day, but there is really no excuse for letting a month go by between postings. Mea maxima culpa.
Today is my niece Teddy Belle's birthday. I tease her about being only seven years old, but today she turned nine. She has become a wonderful young lady, and I wish her continued growth in the knowledge of the faith and of herself. I had the opportunity to go out to Troy yesterday for lunch, and as usual, it was a pleasant time. I have heard a number of men in the seminary say that when they go home, they begin to entertain thoughts about what it would be like to be married with a family. Thanks be to God, I don't ever have those thoughts. I love my family dearly, but I am quite satisfied with being the uncle.
I will relate something that happened at St Cecilia's today. The director of Hispanic Ministry at the parish is going to have Aztec dancers during the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe and possibly at the Confirmation in the Spring. He knows that I do not approve of such things, but being that I am a part-time weekend warrior, my opinion matters not at all. In any case, after trying to convince me that liturgical dance is a legitimate expression of worship among Hispanics this director has rejected any idea of changing his mind. I suppose what I will have to do is email him the direct words of Cardinal Arinze, and, if necessary, I will email the Archbishop about this abuse. I will be a hated man, I suppose, but I feel I have to say something.
Does anyone out there have an opinion?

Amphibious Assault on Kenrick

It amazes me how much attention we have received on account of our video for Kenrick Alumni Day. We have run into "fans" at St Francis de Sales, at parishes, through emails, and on blogs from all over the world.

Well, today as we were filming our next movie for the October gaud, a lady drove by, rolled down her window, and shouted, "I saw you on YouTube." All the guys looked at each other and smiled, not knowing what to say. This lady parked her car and came by us on her way into the Rigali Center. She told us that her husband is in the group Una Voce, a movement that apparently promotes wider use of the Mass of 1962. He is leaving to Rome soon, where he will be running into a few friends of his at the Vatican, ALL of whom have seen the video and think it is excellent. The VATICAN! That's not to mention that Deacon Patrick Driscoll emailed a link to his friend at the CDF, who will likely share it with Cardinal Leveyda.

This is all very interesting, and a great deal of fun. For me, it is a reminder of the grace of God: with some little effort, God can make it into a great big success.

In the interim, this new film for the October Gaud is called Amphibious Assault on the Old Kenrick. We are all pretty much in agreement that this will never make it to YouTube, not only because it is not as wide a concept as the last one, but because it is too over the top. If you know how the old Kenrick building is being used right now, you might have an idea what I mean.

Enjoy a few pictures on the set of Amphibious Assault!

Prayers for Rita Brown

I ask your prayers for Rita Brown of St Louis. She is a young lady who was sideswiped by a car and is now in a coma with serious injuries. Together with all the members of her family and her friends, I ask that you join us in praying for her recovery. May God's will be done.
Christus Vincit! Christus Regnat!